


Run into the Fire

by thatdragonchic



Category: MacGyver (TV 2016)
Genre: Carlos revisits his relationship with Mac, Flashback fic, Found Family, Gen, Jack being a Supportive Dad, Jasper is a little insecure, M/M, Mentions of Smut, Mild Smut, Past Relationship(s), bi!mac
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-06-28 09:50:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19809808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatdragonchic/pseuds/thatdragonchic
Summary: Carlos thinks that he could have loved Mac more than anyone else in the world. Maybe he's still caught in Mac's fire, but Mac's flame has caught somewhere else- and his name is Jasper Sheriff.(Or Carlos finally visits Mac and meets his beau, causing Carlos to revisit his past with mac.)





	Run into the Fire

“Man, you should’ve seen Mac when he was 19, drooling over Carlos and how perfect his hair was, how strong his arms are-”

“Oh my god, I did not tell you things like that when I was 19.”

“You weren’t 20 quite yet,” Jack says, raising his brow. “He was totally in love with this guy, so all over him, doesn’t surprise me at all that Mac bat his eyes and got his way, he was all sweet looking when he was younger, could name a few people that I had to punch in the face for talkin’ about him- you know, in that dirty kinda way.” 

Jasper gives a bit of a fake laugh, looking a bit annoyed. “Is there a point to you rambling about how some asshats wanted to make my boyfriend their bitch or-”

“Point is, Mac was the apple of a lot of those men’s eyes, and he ended up taking a real big liking to Carlos.”

“Right.”

“It was stupid,” Mac says, rolling his eyes at himself. “But I was young, and he was pretty, and not gonna lie, I thought his dick was big when I was 19, but he was like average.”

Jasper scoffs. “Wow, sounds like you were real in love.”

“I was in love with his abs,” Mac admits teasingly. “But, obviously, he’s married now, and has a kid… kids? I don’t know. He’s never been here before, so I think it’ll be nice, and I think you’ll like him. He’s very level headed.” 

“Sure,” Jasper says, smiling a bit. “I’m sure he’s great. I’m sure this will be great.” 

Mac laughs, kissing Jasper solid on the lips. “Yeah, it will. Even better because you’re hosting, and you always do everything perfectly. Besides, even if you don’t like him, I’ll have to watch out.”

“Why’s that?”

“Everyone loves you,” Mac says as if it’s obvious, kissing his cheek before walking away and Jasper nods, trying not to let what Jack said get to his head, trying to clear his head from Mac’s description of the man. He hasn’t even met the guy, he had no right to hate him. Maybe he would turn out okay, maybe he’d turn out really nice. Maybe he would talk to Jack the whole time, or leave early, or something. Maybe he’d be a real jerk, and Mac would just be uncomfortable and tolerating the whole time. 

Jasper thinks he shouldn’t hope too much, that Mac seemed keen on him.

“Hey isn’t this the same guy who got you beat up in Puerto Rico?” Jasper calls from the kitchen, and he can hear Mac laugh from the other room, hears him walk in. He sees him leaning against the island countertop when he turns around. 

“It wasn’t his fault, there was a hostage situation. I was doing my job and helping. Remember?”

“Yeah but he was involved.”

“He got shot, I didn’t.”

“You got hurt... He didn’t do anything about it.”

“Jessie… he’s a nice guy, who has been my friend for a very long time. I don’t know why you’re so worked up.”

“I’m not worked up. I just don’t want you being uncomfortable.”

“I won’t be. He’s my friend.” 

Jasper nods, and Mac smiles, that sweet smile that never fails to make Jasper melt. “I just want you to always be safe.”

“And I am, double safe, since Jack is here too. Now take a deep breath, best foot forward for our esteemed guest from Puerto Rico.” 

\- In the “Sandbox” when Mac was 19 - 

Carlos was strong, chiseled, in Mac’s opinion very pretty. He made good to talk to most days, and he paid Mac attention without being mean. They got along well enough, even if it hurt everytime Carlos mentioned his fiancee back home, how he found her to be a beautiful woman, how he spoke of her intellect. Mac wanted him for himself, wanted Carlos to notice him. Mac had never really wanted anyone to notice him, not in a… sexual way. Did he want Carlos to notice him in a sexual way? He wasn’t really sure, he wasn’t even really sure he knew what he wanted from Carlos.

Maybe he was just curious about Carlos, maybe he missed his ex boyfriend (had they been boyfriends?) from university. Even if he sort of hated that guy. He didn’t hate Carlos though. He never thought he would. 

Now he’s standing here, eyes shining, the two are talking in the quiet of their base, behind a building where nobody could see them, the fire is glimmering in the background, they could only hear the incoherence of the men’s loud voices, but Carlos’ voice was in screaming color for Mac. 

Mac turns his head to look up at Carlos as he laughs, had he said something funny? His blood is rushing through his ears, he really can’t remember. He never seems to remember when he’s done something right. Carlos leans forward, and Mac’s breath catches, and Carlos seems curious, testing, and then suddenly and all at once he’s being kissed. 

“No one can know,” and then he’s pulling away but Mac glances around before yanking Carlos into a crushing kiss, hugging him to his body tight, he never wanted to let go. He never wanted Carlos to let go. Carlos couldn’t quite pick him up, but Mac doesn’t really care, Carlos was squeezing him tight, and Mac was melting in his arms. The air was warm, the world was spinning. He wanted this to last for hours, but it only lasted moments. 

Suddenly and all at once the world feels cold as he parts.

\- Present day - 

They don’t hug like they used to. Carlos is given an awkward pat on the back, Mac and him standing in front of each other a moment, as if trying to remember each other. He remembers Mac, remembers so much about Mac. Remembers so much of Mac’s quirks, how much he liked to chew gum, how he fixed the unfixable, how half his allure was making you believe you’d run into every fire for him- and Carlos thinks that he wouldn’t, that after everything that lay between them in the ashes and the wake of him going back home, he wouldn’t. But here is Angus Macgyver, looking healthier and happier than ever, and Carlos’ chest gets tight, in a way that’s almost bitter. He knows just then and there, he would still run into fires for Mac. He’d let hell consume him, if it meant Mac remained untouched.

“And this is my boyfriend, Jasper,” Mac introduces, holding onto a strong arm, beaming, and Carlos wonders how he missed him. The man has a plastic smile, but he’s clean shaven, well dressed, strong. His eyes are cold, they read through him. They know his deepest secrets, and for that, Carlos knows he should be scared.

For that, Carlos thinks he might be saved.

“It’s nice to meet you,” the man says, Jasper, that’s what Mac said. He has a nice voice. 

“It’s nice to meet you too… have you been dating long?”

“About 2 years now.”

“Wow… So, it’s pretty serious then?” he asks Mac, and Mac’s eyes shine with adornment as he looks up at Jasper. 

“Yeah,” Mac says, a little dreamy. Carlos can’t remember Mac ever looking at him like that, looking at anyone like that. Mac rubs Jasper’s arm. “You wouldn’t believe the dinner he made us, he’s a phenomenal cook. I keep telling him that think tanking is not his true calling but he never listens to me.”

“I listen to you, I just file it later for consideration.”

“Consideration he says, but-”

“Filed away for consideration,” Jasper assures, kissing Mac’s nose, Mac puckering his lips then seeming confused at where the kiss lands. This makes Jack laugh, he says the two were being dorks, and not to run carlos away by being gross. If you asked Carlos, he thought it was sweet. Sweet that Mac had someone to mess around with, someone who made his eyes shine with adornment.

Mac steps back from Jasper and gestures Carlos follow him into the house. He gives a vague tour, shows him where the bathroom is, leads him onto a deck, stunning view that it had over the city. The fire was already lit in the middle, and it danced in Mac’s eyes as he hopped down and grabbed the beers he’d left on the bench, handing one to Carlos. 

“So it’s been a few months, it wouldn’t hurt to catch up.”

“Where are Jack and your boyfriend?”

“Jasper. And they’re inside, Jasper loves having help in the kitchen.”

“Should we go help them?”

“Jasper will bite me. Or maybe Jack will bite me. I don’t know, but they’ve made it pretty clear that you’re a guest and aren’t to lift a finger, and I, you’re wonderful host, am to keep you company.”

Carlos laughs. “Then who am I to deny good company?”

“Nobody of importance, that’s who.”

They both laugh, and Mac sits down after Carlos does. They’re sitting nearly knee to knee, Mac leaning back with his arm hung up on the deck, his neck arches back as he tries to see who’s opened the door. Jasper’s voice comes through and then he disappears back inside. Carlos doesn’t quite know what he’s saying, he’s not quite sure how he feels about the man. He looks back to Mac, how his neck softens as he looks Carlos head on, small smile in tact.

“So… you never told me exactly how the house ended up?”

“Oh we finished it recently,” Carlos admits. “I could show you a picture.”

“I would love that.”

\- When Mac was 19, but like a few months after that first encounter -

His neck bedazzled with the shower water was stunning, and he tasted so sweet under the shower, his skin soft and supple. His skin was turning red from Carlos’ facial hair, he gasps when Carlos bites down, chest pressing up against his own. 

He lifts Mac against the wall, rubbing up against him, and Mac moans, hands running down his arms, locking their lips to keep himself quiet. Carlos wanted to keep him safe, wanted him to trust him enough to fall apart, wanted to hold him closer and closer and kiss him forever. Could run his hands through his hair all day. 

And yet he knew he didn’t deserve this. He didn’t deserve Mac. He didn’t get to have Mac, and his fiancee. He knew at heart that he wouldn’t choose Mac, that sometime in the future he’d have to confront that and ruin Mac, who’d trusted him, and maybe even loved him. Did Mac love him? 

What had he  _ done _ ?

But Mac moans so soft, and sweet, as he climaxes, lips dragging by Carlos’ ear, and he doesn’t care what he’s done. He doesn’t care if he has to break Mac later, he holds him together now because that’s what he needs and maybe it was selfish. Maybe he just missed his fiancee back home, maybe he just was desperate for physical contact. Maybe Mac felt the same. 

Maybe Mac knew what he’d bought into. Maybe Mac didn’t care. Maybe Mac wanted to tear Carlos to shreds, but so long as he orgasmed now, so long as he had attention now- what did it matter? 

Mac pushes him off when Carlos is done. “Should go, someone’s gonna find you here.”

“And then what will you do?”

Mac kisses him quick, smirking. “Well, we both know Jack won’t let you stay anywhere near me if he finds out you’re messing with me. And if we got caught, I guess I’d just have to protect myself.”

“For Jack’s reputation?”

“And mine. I like what I do… Besides, you’d do the same.”

There was something wicked in his eyes, something playful, and Carlos wanted to move forward and bite, make him laugh in ecstacy but he doesn’t. He knows better. He refrains, he doesn’t find out every noise that Mac can make, because he knows he’s not allowed. He knows it’ll get him caught. He knows that they’ll believe Mac, and put the two at the furthest possible distances from each other. 

It was all a coy game, and Carlos might never win. He wanted Mac in full, and yet, he had someone waiting at home, already holding his heart. If he sees her again, he’ll forget his laughter, and maybe that’s for the better.

\- Present Day -

Mac had disappeared inside to help bring out the dishes to set the table, and as he re-emerges with his lover, he laughs so full it hurts Carlos’ lungs. His smile is radiant, genuine. It wasn’t like when he came to Puerto Rico, he had looked so tired then. He had seemed so wounded after dealing with those men. He wasn’t a boy anymore- like he had been when they were in the army. He was an adult, and he was happy, and he had someone who seemed to love him dearly. He doesn’t know, really, if he likes this man. He can’t imagine that Mac liked his wife very much.

But it doesn’t matter, because the next thing he knows, he’s being seated. There’s a sparkling wine in front of him, or maybe it was champagne- was there a difference? Mac doesn’t sit until his lover has a full plate in front of him, and his lover doesn’t eat until he’s seen everyone else at the table take a bite. Mac dotes on the man in little ways, and the man pays the utmost attention to him.

He doesn’t realize he’s supposed to be amidst conversation until his haze clears, and Jasper, that’s his name, Jasper, is staring at him, his brow perched high, eyes glazed sharp. Fascinated with the man before him, and Carlos knows he must have been staring at Mac, that perhaps he was staring too long. He clears his throat, and Mac doesn’t seem to notice the tension, he’s just picking at his plate, glancing up.

“You okay?”

“Yeah… uhm… I missed it, I was admiring the- uh- the panels on the walls. Since rebuilding the house I’ve taken quite an interest in these things and your panels are quite nice,” he admits and Mac laughs, confused, and he nods.

“We were just asking about your daughter. You have one right?”

“Oh, uh, yes, I have one daughter. She’s a lovely girl, she really is. Do you want kids?” he asks the two of them.

“We agreed when we’re married,” Mac says. 

“Damn right, that’s what I deserve,” Jack says. “See my babies have babies.”

Jasper snorts. “Riley doesn’t get that talk.”

“Because Riley hasn’t been dating someone two years and plans to get married.”

“And what if we don’t get married?”

“Dead to me.”

Jasper refocuses his attention. “So you like having kids?”

“I do, I think it’s very rewarding.”

Jasper nods. “So I’m curious, Mac said you two were old army buddies, he doesn’t talk much about it though.”

“About our relationship?”

“No, I know everything I need to know about your relationship with him. I meant the army days. Maybe you have some good stories.”

“Oh… well… I don’t know, I mean… that’s up to Mac.”

“And why not? You really don’t remember anything,” Mac says, as if it’s obvious he’s consented to this. He doesn’t even seem to notice that this guy was being a jerk, maybe he was always a jerk. 

“Maybe all he remembers is that pretty smile of yours, angel,” he says, and Mac laughs, blushing a bit. 

“Oh please, you’re just saying that because you love me, and my smile.”

“I love everything about you, doesn’t make it less true.”

“It’s incredibly biased, Mister Sheriff.”

Jasper shrugs, and Carlos wonders if this brutal force of nature that Mac had fallen in love with calmed, if only, for Angus Macgyver himself. How his smile is reserved, and perhaps hidden for only Mac. How maybe he got to hear his every thought, and hear how Macs voice sounds in the morning, how his tears feel heavy on his chest when he’s diminished to nothing. He wonders if Mac knows everything about this man, and if of all things like himself be consumed by a fire he couldn’t tame. If Jasper was a fire he couldn’t tame. 

“He’s right, I think everyone wants to smile when you smile,” Carlos says and Mac seems pleasantly surprised by the statement. “There’s always something special about your smile.”

“Well, I guess me and Carlos have a bit of common ground,” Jasper says, and he smiles, but it’s not real, his knife slashes into the steak, and bites. He seems regal, but perhaps the red pooling from his medium rare steak is poison afterall. 

\- When Mac is nearing 20, not really 19 anymore - 

Carlos and him lay in the same bed of the hotel, he doesn’t know who paid what tribute to God, but they were put in a nice hotel. And given clean shirts, and Mac was in his boxers, and a tshirt, and curled away from him, reading a book. The scent of his shower products were heavy- and Carlos leans over, kissing the back of his neck.

“What are you doing?”

“Just wanted to kiss you.”

Mac laughs, but it’s cold, he shrugs Carlos off, and Carlos runs a hand down his side.

“Listen, we have time-”

“Time for what?” Mac asks, turning around. 

“Time to be…. Together.”

Mac takes a deep breath, jaw locked a bit, and Carlos leans in, kisses along his jaw like he would his fiancee when she was angry, and Mac relucts, lets his hand rub along his bicep, run over his stubble, and he smiles a bit soft, meeting Carlos in a kiss. 

He sighs softly. “You can be loud tonight, the walls are thick,” Carlos whispers. Mac laughs. 

“Have to make me be loud for it to happen.” 

Carlos laughs, leaning in and placing a kiss on his lips. Mac leans into it, parting. “Is she flying in?” he whispers.

Carlos falters. “Tomorrow…”

Mac nods. “I can’t wait to meet her.”

(he never does. She hears so much about the man her husband claims to be best friends with, but he seems to have gotten lost. Someone says the Dalton’s flew in, and that they were a big family, who’d left to a restaurant off hotel grounds. Mac isn’t in his room that night, and he’s not there the next morning either. Him and Mac aren’t paired up anymore after that.) 

\- Present Day - 

He walks down into the kitchen, where Mac is leaning against the counter. A tea kettle was set, he looks over his boyfriend, eyes following his movements. They’re talking soft, but Mac’s laughter fills the house. Their lips just touch when Carlos clears his throat.

Mac straightens a bit, as if Carlos had never seen him like that: flirty, coy. Well… it wasn’t the same. It was different, the way he addressed his boyfriend, his lover, whatever he was. “Uhm.. Jack said to ask about… well maybe it’s not important, I’ll tell him your busy.”

Mac laughs. “No, it definitely is. Especially if Jack Dalton demands it.” his hand falls from Jasper’s chest, and he poses as if Carlos could fully have his attention- to be fair, a decent portion of the evening, he had all of Mac’s attention. He’s met with the storm behind Jasper’s eyes, and he wonders if the man hates him. He wonders if he knows. Jasper leaves the two alone, going outside by Jack.

“Does he know?” he asks Mac.

“Know what?”

“About our…. Past.”

Macs brow furrows. “If you’re asking if he knows you slept with me, yes he knows. Unlike you I have nothing to hide… not from him,” Mac says softly. They stand there in silence. 

“I’m happy for you…” Carlos says, and maybe it pains him a little but it’s true. “You deserve this… you deserve that- Jasper. You deserve Jasper. And I’m sure he deserves you too.”

“He does. Now come on, we should go outside,” Mac says, before leading him out, kissing Jasper on the balcony when he gets there. “Your tea is near boiling.”

“I’ll check on it in a minute.”

“Oh! And I have a story to tell!” Mac announces.

Carlos smiles, everyone settling to hear Mac’s story, and Carlos thinks that the fire has already consumed him, for all the hurt it causes him to see Mac so enamoured. But yet, he burns anyways, if only to cherish what moments he has left to see his smile. Then he’ll go back to the hotel, where his wife is waiting for him, and his daughter will be fast asleep. And he’ll remember how good it is to have them, he’ll forget how good it used to be, to have Mac beneath him, how he might have been so devoted beside him. But he thinks some fires are meant to burn out- or perhaps remain embers in the air, floating until they find a fire to start. He’ll go to his wife, and he’ll make love to her, and tell her he loves her, and she’ll never know that he loved Mac too. She doesn’t have to. Mac doesn’t have to know, either. He never will, Carlos never wants him to.

Perhaps Mac is better off not knowing. 

Perhaps Jasper is the one for him. 

Perhaps they belong together… Jasper and Mac. Not Mac and Carlos. Maybe once it was Mac and Carlos, but where Carlos burns in Mac’s fire, Mac’s already been consumed in a different flame. (Or perhaps it was more permanent than that. More real.) 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I really hope you enjoyed this fic!   
> Comments are always appreciated <3  
> Posting more fics soon!


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